"The God who knows and guides me" (based on Psalm 139, Psalm 8 and Hebrews 6:19 - 20)

For the director of music. A psalm of Harry

Lord my God, you deserve all of my thanks and praise

For you are the God who sees me

You are the God who knows me

And you are the God who loves me

Searching the world for anything that could fulfil my longings

Has only left me disappointed and destitute

Like a deer panting for streams of water

And finding nothing to quench that thirst

From a young age I sought after satisfaction

Many a time I thought I had found what I sought after

And was crushed and left brokenhearted

Was I wrong to be seeking such things?

If only I had known that my search was futile

At least as long as I searched here below

My eyes were fixed on things temporal

And not on things eternal

But Lord, your Spirit turned my gaze upward

And assured me that my search for solid joys

Was not a chasing after the wind

But was a search that could only be fulfilled in you

For who else can know me like you know me?

Who else searches my heart like you do,

And yet loves me despite all my iniquities and wrongs?

Is there anyone like you?

Who else has been with me even before the time of my birth?

Who else has seen me in my simplest form

When I knew nothing, saw nothing, felt nothing?

You knew me before I existed at all

What am I that you would even be mindful of me?

Why should you even care for me?

I am but a tiny speck in the fabric of the universe

A lowly and insignificant man in the universal scheme

Life for me is but a breath

But you are the one that always was, always is and ever will be

You are the one that gave me my first breath

And you are the one that sustains me till my last

Why is it that the God of all the earth

Would care to know my name

And even live as a lowly human to enact empathy

For one so useless as I?

What mind can fathom the works of your hands?

What heart can perceive the thoughts of the Lord?

They are beyond all imagination

Beyond anything within human reason

Lord, in all of life’s mysteries  

You have provided for me an anchor for my soul

Steadying me when my sails are caught by furious squalls

That threaten to steal me away

Lord, though my heart may at times waver

I know that in you my hope is firm and secure

And that you are all I need

For life, for health, and safety

Search me Lord and know my heart

Test me and know my anxious thoughts

See if there is any offensive way in me

And lead me in the way everlasting

Approaching the throne of grace (based on Hebrews 4:14 – 5:10)

For the director of music. A psalm of Harry. To the tune of “Before the throne of God above”

Lord, your glory is high above the heavens

Your majesty is matchless

Who can compare to the glory of the Lord?

Who can enter his presence and not perish?

His rule is endless

And his throne endures forever

For God alone is the Creator

The Lord alone is uncreated

Who else can say “there was never a time when I was not”?

Who else can always say “I AM what I am”?

Without beginning or end of days

Our great God reigns

Yesterday, today and tomorrow

Past, present and future

While all human powers and dominions come and go

Rulers and kings rise and fall

Governments and authorities established and destroyed

Laws, statutes and regulations enacted and abolished

Yet the Lord, his law, his rule and his dominion

Will never see an end

Behold the throne of God!

Who can stand in his presence?

Who can bear to see him and live?

His glory and majesty, none can share

And yet there was One

With no beginning or end

The very essence of God himself

Who took on the very essence of man himself

Who stood before the throne of God above

And put before him my plea for mercy and grace

There is no other Name

By whom we can approach the throne

For there is no other who has been tempted,

And yet remained sinless

Where Adam fell, he rose to the challenge

Where we all stumbled, he continued to walk in the light

Our pleas alone cannot be heeded by a perfect God

For our pleas are tainted and warped by sin

But the plea of the Righteous One,

Our God in human flesh,

His plea alone could suffice

For his plea alone is perfect

When I failed to revere God and submit to him

Christ showed unswerving devotion

And submitted to God the Father

Saving “not my will, but yours be done”

Through his suffering he showed perfect obedience

And bore our pain that we might live

That we might approach that everlasting throne

And not have to fear his retribution

For the everlasting throne, a place for mercy

So “arise!” I say to my soul

For I know now that I need not fear

For his perfect love has driven out my fear

And his grace remains with me

Reflections

It's been a long time since the last post... And all I can say is that God is amazing, and it's crazy how far God has brought me in these past few years!

Just a few reflections:
God often has strange ways of doing things, but he works through all sorts of things, even strange people like myself (1 Corinthians 1:18 - 2:5). I've been seeing a whole lot more of my own weaknesses, but I know that at the same time the only one I need to please is God, and he's already pleased because of what Christ has done

Being in a close relationship with someone really allows you to see a lot more of your sin. I've certainly seen a lot more of my own ever since starting a relationship with Shirley, and I'm sure marriage will bring this out even more. But looking forward to what's in store nonetheless!

Rest is an amazing gift from God. It reminds me that this world will end one day, and that all the difficult times will be left behind. Rest reminds me that God is the one in control. It allows me to sit back and watch the hand of God at work. It reminds me that I am absolutely powerless in the whole scheme of things, but that God has included my in his work nonetheless. And what an amazing privilege that is!

The Church is an amazing creation, as it is the body of Christ, and carries out God's work in this world. Being a part of it is a tremendous privilege and amazing joy even though the church we currently see is so imperfect. But I look forward to seeing how God will bring his good work into completion :)

The mind is a powerful tool, and can be so easily affected by outside influences of this world that can lead me astray. The heart is also deceitful, and mine's certainly got a lot of issues that need to be dealt with. Thank You Holy Spirit for working on it :)

I Pray...
That in understanding my own sin much more, I will learn more about how deep God's love really is in forgiving me for my sins, and how great was the sacrifice of His Son (Romans 5:8).

That in view of God's mercy I may lay my life down as a living sacrifice for my great God (Romans 12:1)

That my love may abound more and more in the knowledge and depth of insight so that I may discern what is best and may be pure and blameless on the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ, to the glory and praise of God (Philippians 1:9-11)

And... I pray all the same for my lovely fiancee, and for the whole church of God - all my brothers and sisters - those I know and those I have yet to meet one day :)